Socks are everywhere. They’re in our washers, our dryers, our sock drawers, our laundry baskets, our hampers, and our beds (somewhere). They’re also almost always on our feet. This might seem dangerous because sometimes we don’t know even know where they came from or how they got there. They are unique articles of clothing, attaching to the lower part of our lower limbs wherever we happen to go. But have you ever wondered why we wear socks? If it weren’t for the potential discomfort of modern shoes rubbing up against bare skin, we might not need socks at all, right?

Wrong. Socks serve a variety of purposes that make them almost indispensable to humanity.  But we also kind of take them for granted. Our feet are some of the most wildly disgusting body parts in the animal kingdom. Everyone has had a whiff of smelly feet at least once in their life, and it is a particularly odious experience. This is because, as previously noted, feet are gross. They are some of the sweatiest areas on the human body and thus often produce ghastly scents.  In fact, if left unchecked, feet can produce up to a pint of smelly, nasty sweat per day.

What do socks have to do with this? Everything. Socks are remarkably absorbent, and all that sweat that might come gushing out of the pores on your feet gets pulled aside by the sponge-like powers of the sock. But socks don’t just compile oozing ounces of sweat, because that would indelibly make the socks themselves gross. Instead, socks allow the sweat to migrate out where it can eventually be evaporated by the atmosphere. Indeed, socks are vital to the health of you and everyone around you, because no one wants to smell the wafting odor of sweaty feet.

What about in cold temperatures where sweat doesn’t even come into play? Feet aren’t as gross in wintertime, and we might have half a mind to throw our socks in storage until the sun comes out again. Socks, however, are just important in cold weather as they are at any other time. In fact, in extreme cases, socks can actually save your feet from frostbite. If it gets too cold outside and you don’t have socks on, then you might be in store for a dangerous loss of blood flow to your extremities. But socks are proving to be invaluable resources. In fact, they could potentially save your life.

Beyond that, socks are just awesome, particularly if you like awesome socks. Of course, there are unimpressive varieties that come in standard colors like black, white, or grey. But real fans of socks won’t settle for boring. Funky striped socks trap your sweat and keep your feet warm just as well as a pair of perfunctory white socks. And who said you had to conform to the mechanical nature of plain socks, anyway? Green socks, much like their grey counterparts, are important and functional facets of your wardrobe. They’re also decidedly more awesome.